Because I Got High | Hardware (1990)

Refined 90's Cinema. Refined 90's Cinema

Refined... Put that up to the mic.

That sounds... awful.

Refined 90's Cinema, Refined 90's Cinema, Refined 90's Cinema.

What speaker? Of your phone

Refined 90's Cinema. Refined 90's Cinema.

Refined 90's Cinema.

Refined 90's Cinema.

Okay wait. Hang on a second.

We're five.

Refined 90's Cinema.

Refined 90's Cinema.

Isn't that weird? It is weird.

Refined 90's Cinema.

Refined 90's Cinema, Refined 90's Cinema

Refined 90's Cinema.

Refined 90's Cinema.

Refined 90's Cinema.

Woah

Is that a voice changer?

It's it's text to audio actually, but

Refined

90's Cinema

Refined 90's Cinema sped up ... laughter

Wow. So we're sorry for everyone. We just made bleed in their earls. Yeah, apologize

I-I-I-I

My apologies to the listeners. That's all I have to say.

Refined 90's Cinema, Refined 90's Cinema. I didn't actually even realize you were recording to be honest

So, Alex was trying to make our intro more interesting with voice changing effets.

on Refined 90's Cinema A.K.A Refined 90's Cinema

with Brendan and Alex

We should like write a song with that tone. I'm actually in the room with Brendan still for this episode of refined 90s cinema

It's weird that I can--it's still--it's always weird when I can look him straight in the eye in order to

Podcast and my mustache is at the point where it bumps into the microphone

Feels really weird because my hairs. ASMR.

Mustache ASMR

Our movie that we're gonna watch today is currently downloading we know absolutely nothing about it other than that

It was number 16 in a list of weird sci-fi movies from the 90s

Because I asked Brendan to pick a number from one to 20 and he picked 16 and that was how he came up with this movie

It's called Hardware. I think I weird dent in my finger knuckle. It's a new dent. I don't know if it's new

But it's a weird dent since we're waiting a few minutes

Do you want to do a Pokemon corner about all your new acquisitions? I mean the new set got released last week

So I bought like a bunch of shit for that that I want to open with Stephanie on Friday

As someone who is ignorant to this, what does that mean? I knew set means that like

They printed an entirely new set of cards and they released it on a certain day with like boxes and stuff

So you could buy new packs with new cards that you've never seen before in them

That is very cool

Both they just release sets all the time so that suckers keep by giving them money

That's me. I don't know I'm a sucker

It's like it's like once every three to five months. They released a new set

And I usually buy two boxes one to open and one to keep and stuff and I open the boxes together

So so they're all sitting upstairs right now. Then I'm just waiting for her to get here next Friday

So we can open cards if you want to open cards with us you're more than welcome next Friday

Brendan. I can't imagine I would want to do

But yeah, it'll be my first time seeing stuff in like a month

So we're gonna open cards together. We're gonna go into both wall wall wands when I pick up from the airport and

That's what the kids are calling sex these days stray from the airport

Airport bathroom and then the morning after the wild wig so you're gonna go buckle on me

What's it called when you don't have sex in an airplane bathroom

But you have sex in the airport bathroom

What's it? It's a mile high club when you're in the airplane bathroom, right? So it's the

Zero mile high club when you do it in the airport

Is that is that her choice or your choice to go

To Buffalo Wild Wings definitely her I should I brought her there last time she was here

Those wings are so good

It's fine for fancy chicken nuggets

It's so good

It's like it's like it's not like a good meal. It's not healthy

Fuck you they give you celery sticks

Yeah, wait with your 40 fucking chicken nuggets

Covered in sauce

And there's like there's that you don't talk to me about healthy meals bitch up over Big Mac pizza

I'll say it right here

Southwestern Ontario go to Mike's Kitchen, https://mikeskitchen.ca has Big Mac pizza. It is the greatest thing

You have ever even it's so good you gave me extra garlic knots

Yeah, but it's not that my point isn't that because it wasn't good

I was when is that you're bitching about me some wings and it's not a healthy meal. Well, you're a big Mac pizza

I'm gonna go for ice cream and you get

Strawberry some bananas and cheesecake ice cream talking about you want to be healthy

I didn't talk about I wanted to be healthy. You were making fun of me about it

And I said I like eating like healthy shit is good to me. It's exactly what I have

And spoiler alert Brendan chicken is healthy. You're like you're clipping a bunch over here

Am I? Oh

Yeah, I did be turned out I'm shouting. I was still awkward

With the mic because I go to take a drink and for my glass, but I've like back up to take a drink. I'm gonna be like

As he was doing that you look straight in my eyes

Like a weird what do I do moment do I react mom save me we got to see Alice Cooper on Sunday

Yeah, there was a cool concert, too

And we get to see Alexisonfire tomorrow night. Yeah, so if you're wondering why we're not releasing a ton of podcasts

It's because we're seeing concerts instead

Fuck all yeah, and I mean I also

I also went back to work and you're working. Yeah, we're busy

We're old men that work too much. I originally thought you were gonna be here a week longer than you are

So in my head we had more time. Yeah, we're gonna have Niagara Falls fun

I'm not gonna say it

I'm not gonna say I'm not gonna say

Well, you guys have to go you have to go to the Niagara Falls power museum. It's awesome. This is glass elevator

You get to see all the old machinery that used to use to spin the turbine that's cool. They have like

I don't know if it's open yet when much when I was not but they have a total glass elevator

That goes down to the old tunnel where the water used to come in

But it's like behind the falls. It's that's well, it's like down the road a little bit

It's like an old power generator station where they had a turbine and these big

Like motors that spun to generate electricity for most of Ontario

Wow, that's cool. And so there's big huge machines. They have that are still there and there's like retired

There's stories from retired workers and really cool tour and they have a glass elevator

It'll take you down to behind the falls. Wow, and you get to like walk right up to it and like the old power

They used it for something. Whoa, okay cooling well how much does that cost to do that?

Wasn't that much 30 40 bucks that's pretty good like

For what and we it's pure like it's brand new. It's beautiful. There's like everything's really nice

Yeah, I mean we'll do that we were thinking about things to do and I think like one of the only things we're going to do for sure

is go to like the aviation butterfly museum the butterfly one and then there's like a bird one

Michelle and I did it was like a card that we got so we could do like three things. How did you get

you different about that on life? Yeah, I'll have to ask her but if we got to do like the green the

Not the aviary but like there's like the green houses okay and then there's the butterfly museum

Clifton hills super cheese, but like yeah, we want to take stuff to like the is it the aviary with all the birds and shit like

I don't know or you can view aviaries

No, okay, so there's the one like play stay though. It's like a rain forest with birds. Yeah, that's the butterfly conservatory

No, it's not the butterfly conservatory butterflies brand it. Even I don't know birds. Yeah, there's like a bird thing there

We have dinner. I'm gonna look this up. Yeah, I don't remember what it's called, but it's like you go in

It's like your inner rainforest and there's like wild life and birds and shit and you can like walk around

Yeah, it's wild the bird cage 1996 time dv them to be bird kingdom

Yeah, that place never heard of this before. It's really cool never been there. I wonder

What is it what's the place called that you wish I went with the elevators that power

Station

Niagara this these are good ideas. I like this. Yeah, this Niagara perks power station

Yeah, the bird kingdom. That's really cool. I even know that was a thing. It's really fucking cool. That's cool

There's a thing inside of it too where like and it's just part of the experience and you go into this like

Little room and they give you like hummingbird feeders that they put on your

Hmm person and then how many birds come into feed like rain out of you. It's really weird, but it's cool. Yeah, this is the power station

Niagara parks dot com

Find 90 cinemas not sponsored by Niagara parks or the Niagara tourism board

But if they want to sponsor us, we'll go there for free dot com. We will totally go there for

Fur and go through the bird place because Brendan's never been there's there's a little I would do for a spot

Not do for a sponsor well Brendan you should have led with that you would have probably got more sponsors

I will do a go to see

Forest

It's a song but all the things we would do for a sponsor

You don't make what they had you're not getting the ride

It's the rules of the road Brendan. I don't want you to be our sponsor

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Just gonna put that in there enough for that. I can do like a refined 90 cinemas musical

This movie sucks. Why does it talk so bad out? I'm gonna have a seizure because of the way the movie looks

Holy fuck, oh my god. Oh god, it's just gonna reflect me Oh yeah, she'll be spared

Mercury hard

Wow, that's a Microsoft paint title screen if I ever somebody probably worked really hard on

Okay, all right

Nick Durman. I don't see what do we know him from I don't think anything

John Lynch that Jane Lynch's dad William Hootkins. Is that Anthony Hodgins

Hitchie pop, you know him. Do we? He's in the stages he's a hard singer turned actor sometimes

Why is it all red? They're like trying to make it feel in hell you're in hell

Oh, you. Well, so the bread desert bitch

Now I got to look up him in generation. I was going to look up Dylan McDermott

So image animation is no longer

Oh, I knew I recognized this guy he was on

The new line order the one with stapler now that he's off of SVU organized crime

You plays a bad guy. It's actually a decent actor. Oh, okay. Also is network there's 20 million dollars

Whoa

He managed if your network was 20 million dollars. No, because I just don't think

That I think you get to some certain point where you're so much money

We're like

Day-to-day like it doesn't matter how much you spend on your credit card

It doesn't matter how big your house is

You just have so much money. Yeah. What's like did you hear what happened with you on Musk?

No Ellen Munsk. No, did you hear what happened with it? Wait

He fuck him. Oh, yeah, what happened with Elon Musk?

So he he was in an interview and he was talking about how he spends billions of dollars in taxes every year

And then when it was calculated how much he actually spent

He actually spent like 5% of his actual income

Which actually most of us probably pay like 40% yeah

So he was like bragging about how he spends more than a billion dollars on taxes and it's really only like 5%

When all of the rest of us spend like 30 to 40 I pay at least 20 to 25% like 15 to 20% of every paycheck on taxes

Just on my paychecks yeah in Nova Scotia the tax that gets taken off it's 26%. So like

That's a just more than a quarter of my income automatically and like to pay only 5% when you're a billion dollar

I mean like fuck off Elon Musk

It pissed me off. I was like you're literally a rich asshole and you're trying to brag about how you spend so much

But really you're actually not spending even close to as much as everyone else comparatively

So it's like a cowboy and they say red desert. He's right like steampons

Shitting well, there's a bunch of like robots. Yeah, there's like a bunch of like robots and bullets

Looks like a nerf bullet and it looks like he's wearing Birkenstocks actually like as low budget of this movie probably is Brendan

I kind of dig like the opening scene. We're very intrigued like I'm intrigued the colors are interesting

He's like digging up a robot hand there's like a little desert what looks like landmines and we are chit

It

Be drank some bubbly juice some bubbly water. He's trying to butt in the sand. Yeah, his own

Did you ever make a sand angel on the beach? I did not I'd always dug like tunnels and sandcastles and

These two he's digging up ahead. Is it a robot head? I am determined they just said media is like

You say like a sex doll. It's like I have to fuck something before I die and the desert did you just say that his nickname was the man with the industrial dick branded

Should we back it up and make sure I think that is what he said

So he's like a shock jack in the post-apocalypse. Yeah

How much do you want to bet they just fucked up the coloring and so they turned it red and made it post-apocalyptic. I mean, yeah, you're probably right

That's a weird like we still want to keep a decent if there's a ever and they're probably will be

Maybe even in our lifetimes like a global disaster yeah global warming world ending world shifting event

So what if

That event is like you want to retain as much of

The world that we know as possible

So do you to that end?

Do you try to continue as much of the

Institutions as normal like radio shows and

Schools and TV stations and

The internet it's kind of interesting so I think it depends on the type of disaster that happens right like there is a show

I watched called revolution that it got canceled after like the third season but it was actually a really good show

Because it was about what if all technology on earth just stopped working all of a sudden

Like there's no all of a sudden no more electricity or technology and you have to just like move on from that and if it took place like 20 years after that

Global disaster happened

It was super interesting like everything kind of reverted back to like

Calboy life and shit again, you know, it was literally and so it was just a fun show to watch because it was super out of the realm of like anything that we're used to

So I guess it kind of would depend on the the type of disaster that happened or the type of like world-ending event or whatever

So the traders were like

Barnering pieces of robot. Oh, he's got a

Some sort of very cheesy robot again. He's a sideboard

He's a science guy. They're like bartering on how much?

What the fuck is his eyes?

Dan, they're still they still have regular money dude. Skye talks very quietly. It's hard to hear what he's saying

Yeah, the audio balance in this movie is pretty atrocious. That seems pretty good. There's like a

Fat man who's who's like a jeweler, but for weird robot shit

Accumially look at how terrible that yeah, that was like that was such a weird

It's Christmas Eve. This is junk. This is like me with video games, but if it were an apocalyptic situation and I had to like deal in junk instead

Which if you think about it as you now

basically

Very expensive collectibles. Yeah, speaking of I bought two Castlevania games completed box the other day for way cheaper than they actually are worth

And I feel very proud myself for finding them. I feel like retro video games in a apocalypse scenario. It's still be

Prized

Because it's like if there's no morombs

People want to still play those games

Yeah, and like different CRT TVs are one of the only TVs that would work properly still eventually right like

I don't know I guess everything's based of electricity, so you'd still have normal TVs

But you are right though if the internet's not a thing anymore like you imagine if the internet

Just like died

Actually, if he funny, we wouldn't be watching this movie right now if I didn't have the internet or doing a podcast

Well, if you go carding out like a set on a real-to-reel tape

Recorder and it would cost so much money

That we'd never save an episode what the fuck is this chick? She's like sleeping. Is it due to a woman? Oh definitely a woman

Oh, Brennan, she's hot surrounded by weapons meditating or something entry request yet old-fashioned keyboard

Which is funny because like we have that now like we have cameras that you can move with your

Fucking phone and you would never jack into like a telephone switchboard

She's like some sort of a cop or something

Vernon which actor is that the guy? Yeah, he looks so familiar

That would have the window

Skyline is the fakeest thing. Yeah, we don't know if she's smoking cigarettes or

Mary Joana it also is the fakeest smoking I've ever seen like no smoke is coming out of the room

Whatever what the fuck is that

She's boiling water in a coffee pot, but it's full of

Ins like bugs

Is it bugs or like well, did you see that she had like a control panel for her house? So it's like boiling water for her

It's because she's tough as nails

She eats bugs for breakfast. Fuck yeah

America

She looks old maybe she looks old now. What is she doing right now on some gloves dude?

Welding something she has well there's helmet and it's like a plasma torch and she's

Wearing what looks like oh, this is like from the opening scene the plasma torch

Okay, first of all

It's the fucking future. Why don't you have a backpack

It's got like sticks and a bundle

Yeah, there's gonna be a million back back. Oh, well, maybe in the 90s there were less backpacks though, you know like

We still have like hiking back in 90s so this would be like the future as if it were what the fuck? Why is it?

This runs with a Tony Hawk to saw

Oh, it's ace of spades by motor yet. I was like, how do I know this song you guys are trying to find the young

Remember I wrote oh I had done because the water is not drinkable

I feel like that's gonna be a bigger like something like that like our water is not gonna be

Potable anymore that's gonna happen way before

Environmental like global warming

Environmental disaster, but yeah, there's gonna come up point where we have to boil all the water. We drank or something

Who are masks because there is poisoning us? Well, yeah weirdo kind of meeting the background

This place is going hell. They just got coming back max. I just can't do it got done. I'm given it all. I've got this fucking creepy baby

It's tied up I agra could you ever walk on a staircase like that? I mean, it's just a steel staircase Brendan

Yeah, it's you can see to your death so y'all that was so that was prime quality acting Brendan that was

Exposition keep it up when I'm not around

Make sure nothing happens to me

Vash out of wait this fucking oh she's like plasma welding or

Open cutting open something it kind of turns me on when chicks plasma weld. I've learned something new about myself today Brendan

But probably letter yeah

She changed the code said it like x is or something

Jill it's mo and chase chase chase chase I think is his name

She has like a oh, that's like a do a similar for a radiation. I love that sound. I think you were closer than me. I think

Do you see that your noble documentary? No, it's like a like a fictionalized

Three part mini series

Excellent, but we still don't figure it out like what they're doing. Yeah, I don't really know what this movie's about to be honest. I'm kind of just

Hmm

They call them shades because he's always wearing sunglasses. Yeah, that's got to be it. Oh shit. They brought her some cords and some metal

It's a maintenance drone just making sure

Smoothie won't keep us here too. I have a feeling if it's gonna continue to be this slow. Oh yeah, baby

They let's just start talking about bridge shit. We're here. Let's talk about the backstores of the characters back

These two are gonna bang because they're totally like together or something. Why is he touching his crotch?

Oh, yeah, oh, yeah

They're like rubbing up on each other dude. I'm ready

She's just walks away. I'll give him a few minutes. Oh, she has beer. He just leaves

She thinks it's gonna like activate maybe. Where do we see the reflection of them bangin? Oh

No, that was interesting. I was a cool transition

Okay

Kyle Kyle Kai

She is at a wedding ring

That's one on both of their middle fingers. No, it's not just on hers. I don't think it is a wedding ring

For how ugly her apartment is she has a decent size

shower. Yeah for real. Also, this is like the weirdest sex scene ever like it's not it. They're just like hugging in the shower and he's got a weird mechanical arm

We're gonna see some butt

Do you see how it like how in the hand was like oh shit. There's like a legit sex scene. Let's move it

That's what little bunch of movies do to fill time

A blocked out sex scene where you can't see anything. Yeah, and he's literally putting his hands up over top of her

Tips. It was in her country and it's like dark. He's clearly wearing fucking underwear

So she oh, but that's okay. Well, sure. This helmet is creepy dude. It's like checking him out the whole time

Yeah, see I told you it's gonna activate it. It's check. It's going red and top looks like how and it dies

The helmet is being a peeping time. Sorry, Dave. Now we're on a track in a building

Oh, it's making like a

flea camera heat

image

Wait, is it copying his voice? Oh wait. Oh, we're hearing their dirty talk. Is this like a low budget terminator?

Or is this just like soft core porn? No, but like it's like a low budget terminator like the it's the machines talking to each

Oh, no, this dude. He's watching them through the helmet

But all he can see is like the heat signature. That's creepy. No, or is I think he's watching through like a

Always taking pictures creepy. And he's got Polaroids weird. He's like fucking

This guy's a creep dude watching them have sex or they can't run like his lips and oh my lord

And yes, he looks exactly like you do yeah, he's super done tail side burn

Hawaiian shirt band a bit over a way. He's joking it. He's smoking and jerk. Yeah, and his stick

He's talking out. Oh my god. He's not comfortable. This is

What the fuck? What is that shit in the back? Oh, yeah, weird face thing

No, he was watching through like a telescope. I know, but like what's that weird thing behind the telescope the fuck is that?

It's a sex-droner. Yeah, the weird and he had Polaroids and women choose in his apartment

Creepy dude

We're gonna come out now. That was the weird just like over commentary of a fucking sex

Yes, I've ever seen. Yes, it was just because we thought you're like dude saying it

It's just this like creepy like weird fat dude being like yeah, baby. Take it's big dick

Sure is that the goal of the movie is they're gonna like find they do

Like yes, I still know what the fuck the point of this movie is. There's and there's like weird agent as

Glasses is meditating his name shades Brendan. Oh, sorry. That's glasses

Muscle's got like that was you know what does senior rise me? I've ever seen a mannequin pile

What do you remember?

Finch he meditates like this though. It's reminded me of Finch from Mega Pie. He's a hacker

Who is downloading classified military files?

Oh the fact guy. Is that the same guy? It's not the same guy. The the

The little person we saw in the earlier scene is downloading secret military files

It's freaking fusing. What is it with all these close-up on lips too like and like side face?

Yeah, it's very strange. It was like an after orgasm that woke her up from her sleep or something

What the fuck was that? It looks so weird

That's the way we compare the movie. Yeah

You know movies a lot amazing. Well, we have to resort to sex jokes and stupidity

You can't answer your question. I will pull. You don't even know like there's no plot yet

No, we just know there's a weird helmet and I creepy do that was creeping exposition a creepy dood a little person selling

Robo parts at a sexy

The other guy meditates with a bunch of candles like sounds like a prime time movie to me

That's a wrap boy and she lives in this weird apartment with vaulted ceilings and a

Fridge that looks like it came out of a cryogenic lab

Like to plasma that's what's in her fridge and sinful baby. No, I need the future and in the future

No more real food. It's all powder and you put in a machine and it poops

Poops poops out real food. I want some lack of plasma. No people like eating food

Hey, it's Alex Jones and they did talk about that. There's like birth but there's birth

Control what are these TV shows what the fuck

Dude, it's Alice Cooper. We just saw him on something

Looks like choir like

She like turned on by machines or something like

Also, I love that it's the future but it was 1990 so she had to smoke on camera right

Yeah, otherwise it wouldn't have been she got to be all cool and smoke on camera because it was yeah, you're right

Those are 90s

She's putting the head in a vice

And let me give you some advice

Ma

Spray painting it. She's painting it cool colors, Brendan. But why? Because she's a weirdo

And she's not painting it well

No, she's like those lines were so thick and now it's done already. Oh, with an American flag

Oh shit. What in the fuck is she doing? What is this movie? I don't know

Rotten Tomatoes hardware in 1990

X soldier Moses Baxter comes into his possession of some

Spare Android parts. He buys them as a present for his artist girlfriend Jill and then she puts them in her

Project and it comes to life and murders everybody

What the fuck was that? That was so random. I had no idea. She even had favors

And then it just showed his lady pounding on her ceiling with a roof. Yeah, so she like be quiet

But yeah, it was like Mr. Heckles from friends, but in this weird hardware 90s sci-fi movie

You can hear the rain in my thoughts

S**t

He's such a like I have an actor. He's very

Is monotown as much

We're like

Yeah, like he makes it sexual when or like so not sexual was sort of a movie for

Robotic hey babe. Check out my Robotic

Ah, nothing. Yeah, I like that.

I can't hear the rain.

Well, keep just woke up. He's already like a baby.

I want to see our rubber.

Uh, and by rubber, I mean,

dick.

It had a, made five million at the box office is rated are probably because of the

fucking software for five minutes.

A sex soldier and an artist.

But like, doesn't you have a job?

It got a 50%.

The theme for this movie, like the sub caption on the title is Hardware.

You can't stop progress.

And then that picture on the on the movie is this.

So I assume that weird helmet thing is going to turn into like a psychotic

killing issue. It's like trucks. You drive. You die.

These trucks had like a really interesting

Tonka truck killing a dude, a post office man.

And like a guy that wanted to fuck his wife, but she

clearly wanted nothing to do with him and stuff.

Like it was just, there was some fun dynamics to that shit.

Like they couldn't imagine cell phones or flat screen TVs.

I mean, it was the 90s. So we didn't have any of that picture.

Had a flat screen TV.

Did it really?

In the house in the third one.

Oh, fuck me. He's got to meet him in one hour.

So back to the future three came out the exact same year as this, but it had a flat screen TV.

Classified military file.

So Mark 13 is going to be like the robot.

But oh, so he's like fine doubt about it. So he can like work on it.

And like control it from a distance or like a reverse engineer.

Yeah. So they can use it in their like new society.

He's trying to make him a better arm like a flashlight or gross statement.

They didn't have flashlight. So it was the 90s.

They had to use their hands like caveman.

There's a shower one. You can like suction it to your child.

What? Like to like to the wall.

Yeah. So you can just like fuck it. Yeah. That's so weird.

What the fuck? I guess there's like sectionable dildos for women.

So yeah. Same thing. I just convinced him by a flashlight.

No, I'm not going to buy a flashlight. I was laughing at this fucking stupid scene.

Use coupon code refined 90s cinema for 10% of the

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Dude, he like the door and the elevator opened and the dude was just standing there all like

somber and downtrodden. Like he's in his life.

Like you just got laid by some hot red head chick that for some reason.

Like you. It's a apocalypse, Alex. So everyone is sad all the time.

No, if I was getting laid in the apocalypse by some hot red head,

I would be pretty happy. I think.

Did it?

Yeah.

It'd be like that scene from 500 days of the summer where he walks out.

There's like the whole orchestra playing. He's dancing down the street.

And now creepy dudes watching her from the other end of the helmet again.

So he's in through the helmet. Or it's also through binoculars.

No, it did through the helmet.

How did he get the color pictures? Because he had color photos.

No, he didn't. He just took photos of this stuff.

Oh, she like you?

She's how they're red lights.

It's also super creepy by the way.

He's wearing rubber gloves.

Yeah.

He's like, like staffed on doing his wrist.

It's like a fucking doctor. He's like the dentist.

Oh, dude. There was a scene like that in the dentist.

There's a chin in the dentist.

With the fucking rubber gloves.

That's the guy.

What?

He like called her.

This weird creepy dude called her and is now like staring at her and weird.

The guy was like trying to get off.

Yes, he gets that camera on like a telescope.

Weird.

It's very invasive.

It's like some dude that like creeps her from a distance on regular basis.

So when we want the dude to find the helmet in the desert.

Oh, baby.

So that he could like, what would you have to do with it?

Well, because he's watching them like fuck through the helmet.

That's how he's getting the like the heat.

Maybe it just isn't stuff.

And there's lots of heat.

How do you get a call like that as like anyone?

And then just like go land your bed chill smoke.

So you're out and watch some movies like I feel like you creep.

I'd be like in my own head about it.

I would be calling the police.

Yeah.

Get tracking that number, lock in my doors.

Look at this fucking reindeer commercial dude.

Radiation free reindeer stakes.

Oh, the helmet thing.

She's really like take the eyes out before she.

What the fuck it?

Oh.

Oh, the robots like fixing itself.

Oh, no.

That's like stop motion.

Yeah, they stop motion.

The wire is coming back together and stuff.

They stop motion's like cool.

Yeah, I actually like this a lot.

It kind of is like terminator a little bit.

Oh, oh, his pieces robot parts are doing the same thing.

Yeah, I think they're all parts of the same robot.

Like I think that's all trying to build itself back together.

Where's like different robots, but they all reactivate.

Yeah.

That was probably my favorite scene in the home.

It was just for though.

It like connected itself to the power grid and like fried the fact

that it like reconnected itself and stuff though.

Like look at this shit.

This is actually creepy as fuck Brendan.

And it's all stop motion.

I am so happy that there was stop motion.

That makes me happy.

But it was actually like cool.

Yeah, it was done really well, actually.

Also, she's like super smoking weed.

All right, Dave, I was going to fix a robot and then I got high.

I was going to fuck my boyfriend, and then I got high.

There's been a lot of musical numbers by the refined 90s.

And I'm a crew tonight tonight, which is funny because both of our girlfriends actually have

beautiful singing voices.

They do.

And we do not.

Dude, this robot's coming to life, dude.

It's going to fuck everyone up.

He walked out of the alley and he was like,

oh, the dude's dead.

Oh, you know, he got murdered by that robot.

Of course he did.

I was going to go out of bed.

But then I podcast.

What is this scene?

This is like a scene with the fucking, what's the same shades?

Yeah.

And he just like, fucking, what the fuck?

Has he been doing that for like three days?

Yeah, he's like the whole movie.

He's then he laughed.

He's been him fucking meditating.

And like, where did he go?

Oh, let's go, man.

See your orgasming?

What the fuck is happening?

So it's my heart.

It feels like an allocate.

Like a lag guitar.

What the fuck?

He's a crescing himself.

Is it because he's high?

I think.

And there's like some drug or something they need to be scared of.

And he's in some, why did he just go there?

What the fuck, dude?

This guy's weird to shit.

Wait, does the robot alive now?

Yeah.

Does that mean that creepy guy is still going to see through the robot?

Oh, she's sleeping.

Bring her back to your place and lock the door.

Oh, he said, just let me get my trousers on.

Wow, everything.

He needs to get his trousers on.

He's under.

He's going to get the trousers.

No, he's going to walk around high.

And it's fucking apartment, dumbass.

I knew the thing.

All right, that was pretty good.

She's capable.

She'll fuck this robot up.

Or she's going to fucking die.

Yeah, like it's just splitter neck to sing.

All of a sudden the robots, like, do, do, do, do, do.

What the fuck?

It looks like a drill branch.

Oh my god.

Oh, the shit.

Seriously, the best part of the movie so far.

But, but I think that guy's watching the robot, like, had a circular sign.

It's like, solder bed.

Why did he just sit there and watch?

What would you do?

What the fuck?

He's eyebrows cut off.

Rubber it, but it's like, he's like, drugs.

Is that, must be?

Oh, shit.

It's like, he thinks he's high or something.

Or he is?

Oh, he's a thousand percent high.

Creepy dudes can get fucked up by robots.

I hope so.

He's the only one who deserves to get messed up.

Yeah, I agree.

What is she doing?

Well, they cut a hole in a wall.

She's sliding her butt on the metal.

Why is she on more freaked out?

Where's the robot?

I know.

Like, I'd be way more freaked out.

And the robot should be, like, chasing her ass.

Instead, she's like, I'm gonna fuck this bitch up.

Let me give my blow towards daddy.

Yeah.

But it's not even a blow towards like it can.

Where's the fucking downstairs they were with a broom by the way?

It should happen once.

Said that like, what is that more interested in what that was happening now?

Oh, fuck it's creepy guy.

He's gonna get fucked up by the robot.

Swing mascara.

You went to grab her by her fucking robe and like, rip it off.

He's still wearing a rubber glove.

Dude, don't fuck with a chick with a blow torch.

What are you doing?

She's like, also, he's got like a closer on his face.

Yeah, dude, I hate this guy.

That, he's like, uh, he's like making shit.

He's gaslighting the shit out of her dude.

What an asshole.

What the fuck is he doing gloves?

I hope he dies.

He deserves to die.

He's fucking creepy weird, dude.

I hope he fucking dies.

He deserves to.

He's the least redeemable.

Yeah, at least he's not redeemable at all, Brendan.

He's literally fucking crazy.

Why the fuck is he wearing mascara?

Okay, if it's a fucking killer robot, you idiot.

Why isn't she sleeping?

Okay, she's like at least if the robot kills another one more problem that I'm rid of.

Good thing's creepy.

So did we, like, was this guy a character in this movie just so that they could have someone to kill?

What the fuck happened to the robot?

This is such a long scene with a robot.

Yeah, here.

It's gonna pop back up when we least expect it.

I was going to affect the elevator, but then I got killed.

Wait, she smokes a lot of dude.

Why is he telling her he can see her smoking?

Like, he's literally admitting that he creeps her in there right now.

Yeah.

What do you mean do you want me to sing?

What the fuck is wrong with you?

He's clearly like stalling or doing it on purpose or something.

Can't murder, please.

Right now, while you're singing.

Oh, dude, he liked her nose.

Oh, I was so creepy.

Oh, baby.

I was like waiting for was it.

Oh, like, gave me some image of images.

Like my whole body.

I know dude, it was so gross.

He's gone into the face.

Yeah, he got all up in her face.

So then she was like, we don't want my boyfriend to get the wrong idea and he was like, you know,

you know, Yoshi, remember he was like,

good fucking hell.

I just bought the blinds.

I mean, he already infected her with COVID because he

lecternows that her nostril and shit, but what the fuck.

Wow.

He literally just like lobotomized him.

Oh, while war dude, she just blown his ass away.

This baby isn't too bad.

Never mind.

At least we got to see some crazy shit.

We should have just started the movie halfway.

Who for like, like, 50 minutes in?

Oh, dude, it's the downstairs neighbor with the bro.

She thinks they're just doing it.

She thinks they're banging.

50, six minutes in, you can start the movie and the door is locked.

And the robot is robotding.

Playing chess, Brendan.

Sure, but that grandmaster, they think cheated.

Magnus Carlson lost to Hans Neiman.

So then Hans Neiman's 19 years old, right?

And people are saying, one of the theories was that he had a sex toy in his butt,

connected to a computer and a shoe that was vibrating him moves.

What? I heard about this scandal, actually.

Yeah, with the 19-year old test player that beat Magnus Carlson.

I'm sitting here, but maybe eating.

Maybe you should be better.

Like, maybe you should win.

Maybe the guy who's seven about day.

Magnus Carlson doesn't really have bad days with chess, though.

I guess like the way to beat Magnus Carlson would be to use a chess computer, though.

If you're going to cheat against him.

So that's crazy.

I'm going to read more about that now.

I didn't realize I heard about him beating him in the tournament and stuff,

but I didn't realize that I were like cheating allegations.

Dude, she grabbed a fucking turkey cutting knife to fight a robot.

You're an idiot.

That is terrifying, looking.

Looks like an alien, like it's just wires.

So go in the fridge where it's called.

I mean, he saw you go in the fucking thing.

Okay, then she had that industrial fridge.

He saw you go in the fridge, you idiot.

Cause like normal fridge, you can't just crawl in.

Oh yes, it's a robot so it's stupid.

Yeah, with the infrared.

It's tearing apart her kitchen and she's sitting in the fridge and turned it all the way

cold.

It's tried to hide from its heat, signature, it's got like needles, it's injecting people

with shit.

It's robots like the scariest robot ever.

As her boyfriend, Dylan McDermott, is chasing going through the city.

It does just mows you an odd over.

That's actually nice camera work.

Yeah, not bad.

What the fuck is this shit?

It's like it knows she's there, even though she can't see her at the infrared right now.

Like, maybe as I guess Sonic detection, it's called like lags in a spine and some kind

of a blade.

Eat that.

Oh my god.

It's stupid.

That fucking acting though is so bad.

It's like that fuck fuck.

Like keep attacking it, you idiot.

You got to attack it till it's dead with the hell.

Did you see how that was burnt out?

Or how it was spelled oxy, G-N?

It was like, oh, X, Y, G-I-E.

And I think it was oxy a sudden way.

Oh, that's got like a drill bit.

Oh, it's got a drill bit.

And she's going to take like hair spray and a fucking lighter.

Oh, no, she spray painted over the fucking eyes so it apparently can't infrared anymore.

Oh, she turned on like the stove or something.

That was that good burger dude.

That explosion with the motto burger.

There were definitely good burger explosions.

Definitely a practical effect.

I'm fucking arm is on fire.

She did it.

Congratulations.

You killed the evil robot bit.

I was going to kill the evil robot, but then I got on.

The robot burned all my weed and then I got hot.

What is this music?

Like he literally killed a creepy dude.

If anything, the robot being part of your life was a good thing because it killed the

creepy stalker weirdo that like, you know, he really good, you're all right.

It's a really good thing she had that industrial fridge.

Otherwise, she would be dude, I didn't get him any friend in jail to like try to stuff

yourself.

Like you couldn't stuff yourself into that.

You know what I think is funny about this?

The door doesn't work, remember?

It's not supposed to work because creepy dude never fixed it.

He shoots her.

Oh, the robot was behind her.

Unfire, but still alive.

And there's a way to do it with a baseball.

Why did random other people suddenly show up?

Oh, the nineties.

He fell out the window and the guy was like, he died very, very bad.

And she's literally in shock.

She's been attacked and molested and the downstairs neighbors just now.

She just has there's not another room with a room like quiet down up there.

I'm trying to watch my soaps.

You need to get murdered, Brendan.

Oh, oh my god, you're right.

That city's cape is like, there's still 20 minutes.

You can get eaten or murdered or something.

Why is he wearing a football uniform?

For protection, Brendan.

It's supposed to pocket lips.

It's over.

Oh, she's like you left me.

You left me.

You like to his job or whatever.

The fact creepy dude at least was here.

He liked my nose.

It's more action than I've gotten from you in the last 12 hours.

No, as she glasses is like tweaking from his shades.

They threw him out, chill of the...

Is there gonna be like 20 minutes of exposition?

I don't mean here's something like the robot's not coming back, Brendan.

It's just gonna be exposition for rest of the day.

Oh, she's gonna die.

Robot's because like I want to live in the robot fucking murdered her ass.

And most just like fucking scar-facing it out the window.

How did she even a lot?

She's like on a close line as the robot's cutting the close line.

A power line.

But she can touch the power line.

Yeah, what do you mean if I touch you were both fried?

What the fuck?

The family and the apartment below is just so you didn't dinner?

Yeah, they're gonna savor.

I guess that's why the sex team was so extravagant so that we would believe that the neighbor

thought the whole time they were just having sex.

It's not a power line, it's a metal cable.

Yeah.

She better let go idiot.

Her neighbors are gonna hate her.

I don't think they probably already do.

She's that neighbor.

Feel like if you took off some of his jewelry, maybe be able to move a little

quicker.

Or you know, it's 19 overcrowds.

It's true.

He does have a lot of coats.

She dead.

What the fuck?

I think she's probably dead.

But why was she all bandaged?

Because he bandaged her up, because her robot fucked her up.

Oh, Rover, grab your foot.

Now he gets a foot as well as a hand.

What is it injecting, do you think?

It's actually trying to help us?

You can't fuck with me.

Oh, that's a cliche as fuck.

We tried to stab him with the stuff and hit his dog tags so they saved his life.

Like they heard you talking about how we should take off some of his jewelry.

Where's the other 14 people that came to help?

Where's the other guy?

Where's the other guy?

Football.

Beautiful guy.

The robots still go in and Mo is moving around with his gun as a, like to pull himself

up.

What's his game plan here?

Oh, the robot's gonna tune in to fucking, oh no, he got, he got some of

the venom in him.

Oh, I see.

He was dreaming at the beginning of the movie of this happening and now it's happening

Brendan.

What?

The beginning of the movie was this.

It was this fucking weird blue like shiny shit that that was the beginning of

the movie.

So it's a dream.

Maybe.

It's moving to weird.

It's like rip and it's stuck the venom out of his arm.

I give you a bit by a rattlesnake.

It cuts his wrist and he's sucking his own blood as the robots, like, huh.

Call of fucking on.

Call of the ambulance.

Call of the ambulance.

Oh, there's fucking football guy.

They're helping bandy charms.

Like there's fucking, seven people there.

Yeah, like someone go help the other guy with the fuck.

What the fuck is this shit?

There's like bugs coming out of him and worms.

Is that from the robot venom stuff? I'm so confused. Hang on mom, I'm coming.

I dreamed of this raining.

What then the actual fuck is this shit?

This is the definition of, I don't know how to end this movie.

Make like 20 minutes of bullshit happen.

I don't know how showing you the screensaver from fucking windows.

What? This is fractal, but like, what the fuck dude?

They were like, we don't have any more budget.

Let's throw some random stales of some weird shit.

And it's like religious because he's reading the bio and his name's Moses.

Because he's nuts.

He is pretty nuts.

Don't watch this fucking movie.

Right.

90.

It's cinema.

But I'm not about...

I wish we didn't watch it.

There's some good moments.

Not good.

The robot killing a weird creepy dude was cool.

But it was the one who robbed the river.

The robot was still alive.

Was he taunting him like...

Yeah.

Woooo!

Look at work.

You even say, boy, I'm waving to a man.

The screen's right again.

Who directed this?

I need to know so I can give them a better view on yelp.

This director killed my mom.

This is like the definition of a movie.

I think this is your own fucking conclusion whatsoever.

Jill is like running away.

She's trying to get Mo Alex.

Why is it?

And everyone not in there helping fight this fucking robot.

The cop just died by door.

The robot programmed the door to shut out him.

It's sold him in a half.

The door sold him in half.

And as he was getting sold in half, he shot the other dude.

No shit.

It's a door here.

Shea's is still breathing heavily.

He kind of is like Robert Danny Jr. in traffic thunder.

Mo!

You're so dead.

Get fucked, buddy.

Okay.

How big is this fucking apartment that they have no idea where this robot is.

I've never been ghosted.

Yeah.

Like I felt it.

She's like, I'm gonna miss these fingers.

Like this is ridiculous.

Damn you!

The robot flocked on.

The robot can't understand anything she's saying.

So...

What the fuck?

The robot's going on.

You don't even know who though.

But it just shows a fucking weird like close up on it.

His hand transmitted a message.

By a delta.

Why is the robot just fucking standing there?

And of the movie.

She's got a bat.

It's a fucking baseball bat.

It's not gonna do anything against this thing.

Humans will never win.

Because technology will get to a point where we don't understand the robots.

Oh look, a room we've never seen before.

That's her bathroom.

We've been in there.

Have we?

Yeah.

See?

Oh, okay.

Looks like it was an old like science lab or something.

It's like the bathroom from saw.

Kinda.

You know her feet are fucked up.

That is candy.

She should really wear shoes.

This is intense man.

So so the first time we see the robot under fluorescent lights.

Yeah.

He looks really weird in the light, eh?

Like shades that's finally going to do something.

He didn't even have to jump.

He didn't like this little jump into the door.

Like saw my sophomore the fucker.

He just said that when he came to the door.

Gun would not help in this situation.

This is going to kill himself.

What is this robot doing?

Maybe it's water.

That's it's Nemesis.

It's not IP65 rated.

Oh, now we get a robot.

That's seen.

That's what you're saying.

Like I see the rain or whatever.

I smell the rain and taste the rain bow.

It's a way.

Most said there's a defect in the system.

I see rain.

And that means fucking use the water.

Like it's a machine.

Of course, water is going to break it and ruin it.

There's like that because there's no room for you on this live rap.

I think someone should make like a meme video on YouTube.

That's the Titanic.

But if people in the Titanic actually said what they were thinking.

Robot's brains flying everywhere.

The bat's broken.

They used that voice change or I downloaded Brendan.

Form, form, form, form.

It's going now.

What's going on?

So she didn't have electricity, but she still had a water.

Yeah, it's kind of fucked up.

And it's six o'clock.

Like it's dinner time.

Like what?

It's six o'clock.

It's six thirty.

The robot to dead.

And my boyfriend is also dead.

Oh, Mark 13 is this cyborg though.

So they're going to mass produce it.

The world's overdue.

They're going to die.

Dedicated in memory of Richard Bedford.

Angry Bob.

Iggy Pop

Just use this real name or stage name.

I mean, there were some moments.

We'll say that.

This movie on Amazon got almost five stars Brendan.

No, like that's like the DVD people bought.

Not the actual movie.

I don't think.

No, it is though.

Like some of the five star reviews are like a great cult movie,

but the extras are what makes the sedition special.

Hardware.

Most critics just don't get it.

Can you explain it to us?

Yeah, please.

Can you explain this?

Can you please tell us why it's a good movie?

Cause I don't understand.

Awesome.

Great movie.

Love the atmosphere and story.

The characters were portrayed genuinely.

And the actors did a great job.

What is this person smoking, Brendan?

If you're giving me a future.

Robotic movie.

I'll take total recall.

Or terminator.

Yeah.

It felt very 80s.

I mean, it was released in 90s.

So I'm assuming they worked on it for a few years.

This is the review, Brendan.

This is the one I already.

Title review.

What the fuck just happened?

Yeah.

Like it was.

There was no.

If I had never had this inopsis, I wouldn't have understood how it was all tied together

and how it was all supposed to be happening.

So the review says.

Cause it just the first.

Like it says the first 10 minutes of this movie and the fat man song are awesome.

Really.

Great music too.

Actually, let me and Iggy Bob have very hard.

The rest of the flick is stuck in an apartment fighting with a dramatic vacuum.

Seriously.

I guess if you hate house work, this is the film for you.

Everyone else don't bother.

You'll just want to slit your wrist like the main character.

You want to pose a public look to camp.

Just watch Cherry 2000 instead of at least that film has a story.

I actually spent 12 bucks on this piece of garbage and I want my money back from somebody.

You like endless chatter of three second shake the camera shots.

The best special effects are a red gel filter and the sand in the eye sockets in the wind.

Acting where rolling the eyes like a bunny in the headlights is the ultimate and the soundtrack

that plays like a tenth grade, a remedial arts final exam.

This is the movie for you.

That was the previous record.

The ones that are five stars and they're like those movies also.

Fucking great movie.

Or from people that have never seen Terminator or anything remotely similar.

Like if this was the only movie you'd ever seen.

I guess you would think this was just movies.

Yeah, but like nothing.

I never knew what the fuck was happening ever.

I don't know, it's just weird. It's very weird.

Here's cinematic poetry.

Really?

Endless garbage stacking together adding up to nothing.

What if all the while you had faith?

We're a gut instinct telling you to live.

What if in the last days of humanity?

All you had in terms of defiance was to cling to your individuality.

Hardware is like that.

Either it's style would touch you or leave you puzzled.

Thank you, Phillip Harvey. Verified purchase.

What the fuck man?

I can't believe it.

Some people kind of like this movie.

That's what I thought.

The premise is interesting and theory,

but in reality the execution is a big mess of better sci-fi films

makes together.

Antonis Kay knows what he's fucking talking about.

The fans love it for reasons unknown.

This is a horrible movie.

One of the worst I've ever seen.

Makes my PS4 scream Holy Murder.

The floor was shaking from the PS4 struggling to read the DVD.

Somebody wrote a review on Amazon.

This is what you want.

This is all you get.

Like the song in that credits.

Literally the review from Jeff Alt.

One of the worst reviews I've ever seen.

Period.

That's it.

That's his review.

Pretentious for the price point three stars.

A lot but you terminate or knock off.

Yeah.

We said that probably three or four times.

We were watching it.

Like I.

Some of these reviews are like this was a missed opportunity.

The visual aesthetic is really good.

And the premise is really good.

And I'm like yeah.

All that stuff is great.

But the movie was fucking ass because whoever fucking produced it

or directed it just didn't know what the hell they were doing.

So this review is by a person named Shmugl.

That's a person named.

They said when I was about 12 or 13, I'd overheard some nerds in my local comic book store

ripping on some movie where a highly advanced killing machine couldn't even find

some chick who was hiding in an open fridge all these years.

I'd wonder which movie they were talking about because I'd never managed to sit

through all of hardware until now.

That was something else.

Yeah.

That was an interesting experience.

There aren't many movies that we've watched that I like less than this one.

But this is not my least favorite movie that we've watched.

I think.

I don't know.

There was like one that I absolutely fucking hated.

I think we both did our episode was like 40 minutes long.

Because we just didn't say anything.

It takes forever to get going.

I want to does.

You just want it to stop.

This review from Natasha as,

Oh, the crap Jeremy makes me watch.

It's just sort of like admonishing her porous,

but I love people that are like I only watched the first 30 minutes

because they probably jizzed after the first 30 minutes

because that's a round where the sex scene ended.

That was fun.

Thanks for listening guys.

If you want to check out the worst side of my movie I've ever seen in your life,

check out an hardware from 1990.

It's pretty sweet.

Don't watch it.

No.

Honestly.

There's no reason to watch like the first 10 minutes

because it's actually not bad and sort of interesting and then just turn.

I've been watching the last 10 minutes, baby.

If you want to watch like some softcore porn

just watch like a minute and 15 to be 25 or something.

But if you'll be done.

This has been another episode of Refined.

90s.

Cinema.

With Alex.

And Brendan.

Till next time folks.

See ya.

Don't watch this movie.

I was gonna watch Hardware.

And then I got High -- singing and fade out